I’m fairly intuitive and psychic. It’s a substantial gift.
This was my chemistry professor.
( François Arnaud, for Interview Magazine (via lilgivenchyprincess) )
my dog was supposed to be a police dog but he failed the training for it because he was too much of a wimp. the trainers said that when he was supposed to be attacking dummies he’d run up to them and roll over and wag his tail and they also said he was the worst failure they’d ever seen
what do you call a snobbish criminal going down the stairs?
I don’t know. What?
a condescending con descending.
That was beautiful